the unexpected birth plan.

*BEFORE YOU READ THIS. THIS POST CONTAINS IMAGES OF A CHILD IN DISTRESS. THAT MAY BE HARD FOR SOME TO LOOK AT.*

August 9th, 10pm. We are heading in for my induction. Nervous. Excited. Ready.

I’m 39 weeks. (My doctor let me choose to be induced to due to my previous birth experience. We had some complications.)

Lets do this.

2am. I’ve got this! I don’t “need” an epidural, but I’m having trouble progressing…and my doctor recommended it! So lets try it, I said.

I start to open up, and things are moving along…

Healthy laboring momma, healthy baby boy…

7:30am. Time to push.

It’s almost time!

I’ve got this!

8am. He’s here…

Why is he blue,

why isn’t he crying,

why was he lifeless,

what happened to my healthy baby,

why are there sirens, and people running around saying code red…

What is a code red?

Is my baby alive?

The cord wrapped around his neck.

No crying…

not a word is being said…

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This image is forever ingrained in my head.

This is what I saw. This was our first moment.

My limp, breathless baby.

Nate, my mom, and I were all screaming

to Jesus….

Praying, and begging to Him to save my baby.

Breath life into him, please.

These minutes were the longest minutes of my life.

Watching Doctors try and “wake” him.

Try and help him breath.

Rushing around…

I was screaming yet everything was silent…

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After a few minutes they were able to help him breath.

He wasn’t conscious but he was breathing.

Pictured are Nate’s hands, praying over our son.

I sat in the bed weeping.

I don’t remember much but crying and shaking.

They rushed Beckett off and we waited.

The hardest hours of our life. The unknown hours.

Later that afternoon we were informed that he was stable and okay.

That Beckett was part of the 1% of babies born with shoulder dystocia, and on top of that he had the cord wrapped around his neck while in the birth canal.

He was breathing with help in the NICU, incubated, and ready to meet his mommy.

THANK YOU JESUS.

They said I could finally go down and meet him.

I was dying to hold him and meet him.

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Holding him was the most amazing feeling in the world. My soul was relieved. Seeing him. Him breathing on my skin. Peace filled my heart.

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Our miracle.

Beckett. August 10th. 10lbs 12oz. whom Jesus saved.

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Beckett was in the NICU for five days.

These days were hard.

Trying to breastfeed, and be with him all the time… and having a toddler to take care of.

NICU parents are so strong. There were so many babies in there with such serious conditions, that had been in there for weeks! We felt “lucky” knowing we would take our baby home soon.

During this time we were surrounded with so many visitors, meals, and so many prayer warriors. These few days were hard but we felt Jesus protecting us and giving us strength.

They stabilized him, and he was finally able to pass all of his tests.

And, we were able to take our miracle home.

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